Regular listeners to the Theatre Of Noise will know that we now have a producer. He is called Jon The Producer, and he brings an extra element to the show.

Jon has sex appeal. He has panache. He is debonaire, youthful and gorgeous.

He is everything we are not.

We promised to post a picture of him, and here he is. Can someone please set up version of HotOrNot.com  called RateMyProducer.com? Lee and I will no doubt click the 'hot' button over and over again.

On the downside, Jon The Producer eats Tunnock tea cakes by slapping them on his forehead. This unforgiveable behaviour disgusts us, and reminds us that despite outward appearances, sometimes people can be really ugly on the inside.

So there it is. You, the listening public, have survived the first week of Theatre of Noise 2009.

Its been a good week with Wednesday and Friday's shows being particularly satisfying. One of our blathers from Friday's show was chosen to be aired again on the weekly Refresh FM pick of the week show.

We opened the doors of a new feature on Friday night - The Fryer Tuck Shop. This is where we take random (edible) items and fry them in the T.O.N fryer (nicknamed Boris). We then taste the items and rate them on appearance, taste, unhealthiness and ultimately how much we could sell them for in a tuck shop. We fried a Cadbury's creme egg (it was Easter after all) and Marmite flavoured rice cakes. See the score results in the boxes to the right. Just for our own amusement, we fried an avocado. This looked like battered frog and tasted like a herd of wildebeest urinating on your tongue. Don't try it at home for the love of all that is holy...
Over the last couple of nights we have blathered about gyms, germans and thundercats.

Join us at 9pm on Monday night when we will be testing more quiches in Flansubstantiation I will have items hurled at my head in ADVENTURE - our dangerously violent easter memory game.

In Chainsaw Challenge, we take three CDs which we consider to be not quite Theatre Of Noise material, and we vote for one to meet its maker in the hands of Fil The Destroyer.  Tuesday's Chainsaw Challenge pitted three CDs against each other: I Can Only Imagine (a compilation of, erm, Christian power anthems), an old album from the World Wide Message Tribe, and Deeper (a somewhat bland worship compilation).

Deeper beat the Tribe by one vote, and the poor CD was obliterated with Fil The Destroyer's angle grinder. The terrible results are pictured here. Chainsaw Challenge happens every Tuesday and Thursday. See more in Show Info.

We are now three shows in to our 20 show Theatre of Noise odyssey.

We discussed flatulence, obscure Christian lyrics, Producer Jon's needlessly specific requirements for a girlfriend(*) and whether the entirety of time is simply a cultural wasteland punctuated with a few notable exceptions (we suggested Back to the Future, Will Smith's hats in the Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Schindler's List - oh, and the Renaissance).

We also explored the contents of the Jon's sack in Sackcloth and Bashes. This delightful game involves one member of the team smashing a treasured possession or two in a sack. The remaining Theatre of Noisers must guess what the items are from the pitiful shards left. For the record, Eyan beat me 2-0. During the show we promised pictorial evidence - so here it is.
Join us tonight, when we will be welcoming back Fil the Destroyer and Chainsaw Challenge once more raises its ugly and brutal head on the Theatre of Noise.


* If by any chance you are a stunning woman who is exactly 6 ft (not an inch over or under) with a PHD and a passion for Star Wars - please contact us.....

The Theatre of Noise spawned as a one-off show in 2003's Refresh FM broadcast. It has since spread its tendrils to overwhelm Refresh's post watershed schedule. Its grotesque mix of alternative music, geeky banter and petty destruction has entertained and enraged in equal measures.











On the left you see a guest pelting Eyan with a stale hot cross bun as part of our tenuously Easter themed violent memory game - The ADVENTURE game. Above is Fil the Destroyer poised to permanently despatch the losing CDs following the Chainsaw Challenge.


Come back for more images of 2008's shenanigans over the next week or so....