Destruct-o-rama  

Posted by 9/10ths Full of Penguins in ,

We are now three shows in to our 20 show Theatre of Noise odyssey.

We discussed flatulence, obscure Christian lyrics, Producer Jon's needlessly specific requirements for a girlfriend(*) and whether the entirety of time is simply a cultural wasteland punctuated with a few notable exceptions (we suggested Back to the Future, Will Smith's hats in the Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Schindler's List - oh, and the Renaissance).

We also explored the contents of the Jon's sack in Sackcloth and Bashes. This delightful game involves one member of the team smashing a treasured possession or two in a sack. The remaining Theatre of Noisers must guess what the items are from the pitiful shards left. For the record, Eyan beat me 2-0. During the show we promised pictorial evidence - so here it is.
Join us tonight, when we will be welcoming back Fil the Destroyer and Chainsaw Challenge once more raises its ugly and brutal head on the Theatre of Noise.


* If by any chance you are a stunning woman who is exactly 6 ft (not an inch over or under) with a PHD and a passion for Star Wars - please contact us.....

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Leaderboards...

The results of our stupid games so far are listed below...

Adventure Game

  • Jon: 3.
  • Lee: 2.
  • Eyan: 0 (disqualified).

Flansubstantiation

  • Adsa caramelised onion and mature cheddar quiche: 9
  • Aldi cheese & chive quiche: 7
  • Morrison's Mediterranean vegetable value quiche: 6
  • Lidl quiche lorraine: 5
  • Tesco quiche lorraine: 3
  • Marks & Spencer bacon, leek & mushroom quiche: 2
  • Morrison's cheese & caramelised onion quiche: 2
  • Sainsbury's salmon & watercress quiche: 0

Chainsaw Challenge

  • Claas-P Jambor (power chisel)
  • The Smiling Strangers CD (lawnmower)
  • The Ws debut album (power drill)
  • KJ52's Behind The Musik (sander)
  • Deeper compilation (angle grinder)
  • Chill Cafe (jigsaw)
  • Israel & New Beed's A Deeper Level (battery drill)

Sin Lose Or Draw

  • Fil & Rob: 1 (drinking pop)
  • Heidi & Jon: 1 (black magic)
  • Kathy & Fil: 1 (drug taking)
  • Fil & Lee: -1

Sackcloth & Bashes

  • Michelle 2 (Lee's calculator, Lee's pork scratchings)
  • Eyan 2 (Jon's alarm clock, Jon's toy gun)
  • Lee 2 (Eyan's candy cigarettes, Eyan's Chinese Pot Noodle)
  • Debs 1 (Lee's cream crackers)
  • Sian 1 (Lee's Transformers toy)
  • Jon 0

Balloons & Darts

  • Lee: played 9 popped 8.
  • Jon: played 9 popped 7.
  • Eyan: played 6 popped 3.

Fryer Tuck Shop

  • Deep fried creme egg: £1.50 but just too sweet.
  • Deep fried marmite rice cakes: 45p and bland.
  • Deep fried Mars Bar: 35p at a push.
  • Deep fried jelly babies: 20p and quite nauseating.

Breville's Advocate

  • Dairy Lea and fruit cake toasted sandwich £1.30
  • Tunnock's tea cake and celery toasted sandwich 20p
  • Peaches and tuna toasted sandwich 15p
  • Marmite and Daim Bar toasted sandwich £-1